I whisked money from the stack in my right hand to my left and silently counted. After completing each denomination, I dropped the pile of bills, paused, took a sip of my soda, then began clicking away at the giant calculator. A two-foot long strip of inch-wide white paper filled with blue numbers and red functions trailed over the side of the counter. The hum of refrigerators was almost imperceptible after being around them for twelve hours. The only other noise came from the occasional pop of retracting metal that had cooled down since I shut the ovens off.
I was near the end of a long day at the restaurant. I was new at this location, but had been in management for the small chain for years. Because I had worked for the same company for so long and had moved around so much, it didn’t matter which store I was at. They all felt the same.
I was the last person in the store. The kitchen staff had completed their tasks not more than half an hour earlier. I hated being alone at any of the restaurants at night. I finished up my paperwork, put the money in the safe and began making my rounds turning lights off, closing doors, stacking chairs and making sure the place looked good for the morning crew. After walking through the place three times just to make sure I didn’t miss anything, I finally grabbed my keys, walked to the alarm panel, set it and proceeded to the door. Before opening the exit, I turned, looked back at the place one last time and realized that I left my soda on the counter by the registers. I had thirty seconds before I had to be out of the kitchen, so I meandered across the room, grabbed my drink and headed back to the door. Again, I turned one last time to
THE LOUDEST BLOODY NOISE I THINK I’VE EVER HEARD BLASTED THROUGH UNSEEN SIRENS, INTERRUPTING ANY THOUGHT I MIGHT HAVE HAD AND ALMOST KILLING ANY CONTROL I HAD ON MY BLADDER!
My heart collided with a wall of ribs and I turned and threw myself into a solid metal door with a loud thud. My chest hit first and my forehead wasn’t far behind. I thought I had thirty seconds of free movement after setting the alarm, but was apparently wrong! Embarrassment interrupted fear, in spite of the fact that I was alone in the place. I had no witnesses to the pansy-esque, scared little child reaction I had. What a shame, because even though I had a knot on my head, I was laughing at myself.
So sometimes, when life catches you off guard… oh forget about it. I just wanted to tell a story.
I hate alarms. We had one in the model home I worked out of at my last job. The next day we were doing this big housing fair at the university, so we had some balloons blown up and in the living room. My supervisor sat them right under the motion detector. When the furnace kicked on…bam! Alarm went off. I lived 30 miles away. The security company and the police called me like a million times that night, but I had my phone on silent. Needless to say that next morning, I sped to the office to see what was up. The alarm company kept calling. Stupid balloons.
I concur!!! Alarms are the worst. I’ve set them off at my (not the new one) job multiple times. Seen the cops a few times too. Ooops. 🙂
And a fine story it was! Getting surprised and jumping is an instinct, and yes some times a pansy-esque one! Only one thing worse than an alarm… An alarm going off with fire sprinklers inside a house. I’ve had some guys working on furnaces that have done that a few times, not pleasant. My little one and I play the surprise game too, we’ll hide around corners when we know the other one is coming and as the other one comes around the corner we yell, “AAAAAAHHHHHHH”!!!!! I win more than her… Luckily.
Floyd, I play that game with my nephew. he’s about eighteen months old. The other day he followed me down a hallway at my sister’s house and I popped out of a room and scared him, he jumped and ran away from me… into a wall. At which point he started crying and was PISSED at me. It was hilarious but I felt bad at the same time, he got a total goose-egg out of it and I got a lecture from my sister. LAME. I’ve never had to deal with sprinklers but I hate rain so I bet they’re equally unpleasant.
Ah, shucks. Would have loved to have seen that on video! At least you laughed at yourself. I probably would have done the same.
Every time I tell this story, I get asked if there were security cameras. Too bad there weren’t any….because it was total America’s funniest home videos material! You would had died laughing at me… so pathetic and so awesome.
I have definitely been here before. In high school I worked at a pizza joint and was responsible for locking up. One night I got my keys locked in the door and the alarm went off. Good times.
I’ve set the alarm at my current office off several times. Had the cops show up and everything, it’s always super fun until I get lectured about how much money it costs the company. Boo.
Well this takes me back.
I must say I’m a little disappointed I came to your blog for some good morning insight. I guess now I will have to go back and read some older posts.
Yeah… I’m going for insightful tonight. check back later 😉