Maybe I should just make it a facebook post. Yes, that’s a grand idea. I have more friends on the Facebook than I have followers on the Twitter. I will tell everyone about leading seven people to the Lord this morning, rescuing the old lady and her thirteen cats from her burning apartment this afternoon, and the revival that’s currently going on in the state prison where I lead a Bible study every Tuesday night. I’ll end my bragging with “God is so good.”
But then again, I might miss out on all that treasure in heaven. God knows I scored bucket-loads today, but what will I do with it? Who cares? I should keep this to myself, so I can have a ton of booty there is up there and be better off than all the other saints or whatever.
But, maybe I should tell people about my Godly, awesome day. Perhaps it’ll inspire them to action and more humans will benefit because I shared my story of toil, prayer, bravery and selflessness. I’ll have my “reward” here, but if I’m sacrificing my heavenly treasure, does it make me even more selfless? Could I end up being poor in heaven because I “gave it all away” down here? Ooooh, that sounds cool, doesn’t it? I bet everybody up there would fawn all over me about something like that.
God didn’t make this easy, did He?
Maybe I’ll only tell the world about the seven people that gave their lives to God this morning. Then I still get to invest the old lady and her herd of felines and the prison revival into the “eternal account”. What’s more valuable? Seven salvations, or a geriatric and her pets? Maybe I’ll tweet about the fire, I think saved people are worth more. Ugh, how do I make this work for the best?
★ ★ ★
I’ve stopped caring about my reputation. Part of me is too selfish to give up that treasure in heaven, whatever it may be (I have an idea…) but then again, I also like the idea of having everybody think less of me than maybe they should. Let humans see the attitude and the occasionally rebellious or excessively independent human who happens to think I can hear God for myself.
At this point, I’m alright with it. I think it’s tons better than the humans who polish their appearances, who want to look like they’re better than they truly are. I believe these are the humans whose neighbors claim “were so nice, so quiet, incapable of any kind of monstrosity like this” when interviewed by local news after they freak out and set a dog pound or something on fire. Perhaps my approach is founded on some sort of false humility, or maybe, it’s just a lack of concern for my own public relations. Either way, I’m happy to say what you see isn’t any worse than what you get. Just ask God, He knows…
Or maybe, I’ve realized that none of it was about me in the first place so why worry about looking good?