An amber glow illuminated everything, but the light felt as if it had no source. The sun had slipped down beneath the mountains, but its light was lingering in that beautiful twilight that Idaho summers are blessed with. I found myself in the midst of a group of people who I don’t spend a lot of time with because although we’re acquaintances, I think they’re weird. We were standing at a street corner in downtown Boise, excitedly debating where to eat. I was demanding sushi, but much to my own frustration, was alone in that culinary desire. I didn’t fight incredibly hard for what I wanted because if you don’t love sushi, you hate it. I have yet to find someone on a middle ground basis with raw fish.
As moments progressed into minutes that we stood at this corner, I got a better understanding of why I don’t really hang out with these people, because no resolution had come about. Nobody conceded! I was beginning to feel compelled toward violence, but never quite got that far, because somebody yelled,
the little ‘walk’ guy on street lights lets you go first. You
hopefully end up somewhere completely random and
you get to experience something new. So maybe we’ll eat
at a new restaurant tonight that none of us knows about.
I tend to subscribe to the idea that life’s decisions aren’t already decided for us, and that we have to make the right choices. People have hear me say,
God’s perfect will for your life is relationship with Him.”
I know that God calls people to particular careers and locations and that if we choose to live in His will, there will be moments in our lives where we find ourselves in the right place at the right time, but that could only be a minute or so, perhaps a season. Thus far in my walk with Christ, I have refused to believe that I’m on a tightrope walk, and that the minute I decide to pursue a different job or place to live, that I’m going to fall off and be in sin. God’s grace is bigger than that, but I can’t ignore verses such as Ps 139:16,
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,
that you may prove what is that
good and acceptable and perfect will of God
I actually enjoyed hanging out with my weird friends that night, in spite of the fact that they would essentially roll dice to make a decision, but perhaps I need to be a little more open to spontaneity, because if I can’t tolerate erratic people, how will I ever be open to something seemingly random thrown my way by God?